Back to the Footture: E30

I think its fair to say that we all remember where we were when the scoreline at Hampden read:

‘Celtic 1–6 Kilmarnock’

Its an extraordinary result, and the Sunday night flies by in a haze of tequila and rum, briefly punctuated by games of increasingly poor 5-a-side on the hallowed rubber turf of Rugby Park. By the time that training is due to start on the Monday morning, we call it a night and all head home. I try to get some sleep, but keep getting woken up by press phonecalls asking for interviews.

I wouldn’t mind as much if we didn’t have Celtic again on Wednesday at Rugby Park. As far out of the title race as they are, and despite the fact that the title race has very much gained procession status over the past month, I do not want to give them any more ammunition that the result that we will now hang over them for eternity.

I scrap training and we reconvene on Wednesday afternoon, with a light session before the fans start to file into the ground. The atmosphere is red-hot as Celtic stride out onto the pitch. Billy is suspended so Guus comes back into the lineup and we move back into our more familiar home shape. I’m tempted to give Georgios a rest, but I’m afraid if he doesnt start he might fuck off to Falyraki. Ange comes up to me just before he start of the game and shakes my hand with the grip of a man who is robotically possessed. “Well done on Sunday mate” he smiles, and walks away as I try to reposition the bones in what used to be my hand.

We make the early running with Simone (playing in the Billy position) looking for any excuse to get forward, nearly finding Guus and Georgios with through balls. After a brief scare when Dembele falls theatrically to the ground in the box, Morten drives us forwards, plays it left to a galloping Osame who hangs up a cross for Georgios….SAVED! The diving header is clawed away by Siegrist.

With 30 minutes on the clock I think its fair to say that our weekend excesses have caught up with us a little. I get wind from the subs bench that Paul Nebel had all the players back to his house and some of them stopped drinking this morning, which might explain why Kik Pierie has to duck off behind the advertising hoardings and vomit. As he does this, Osame takes the ball and goes on a magical run down the left, cutting inside and bending a shot just wide of the far post via a Siegrist finger.

Celtic then start to build a bit of pressure and after strong runs from Montgomery and Kyogo, Traore has their first chance of the game — which Coniah does well to push wide to safety. They follow this with a rasping effort from distance by McGregor which flies just over. With time slipping away, Georgios gets a sight at goal and stings the palms of Siegrist, before Coniah saves well from a Kyogo header. 0–0 at halftime.

I decide to stick at halftime and let the players play their way out of their funk, but after 15 more minutes and a Guus Til header off target I look to the bench. Just as I’m giving Paul Nebel his final instructions, there’s a shout on the edge of the box as Osame is brought down. The referee plays advantage though as the ricochet from the foul slides through the defence and Georgios steals in and slots the ball home! 1–0!

Straight away, Paul sets up a chance for Vasilios at the back post, who gets it all wrong and slices his effort wide. Georgios gets a huge ovation as he trots off for Armando and Vasilios has another effort fly over the bar. With time ticking away, our engine room plays keep ball, before Simone finds the space to step through the midfield. He lays it to his right for Vasilios to have an effort — and while Siegrist is equal to it, he can’t do anything other than palm it out to Guus Til, who buries the rebound. 2–0! Its a brilliant win and one that the fans savour as the stands remain full for our parade of the League Cup trophy round the ground after the game.

The players get a few days off before our next game in ten days against Rangers and some head off on international duty. Scotland shock France with a 2–1 win in the Parc de Princes, with Billy starring in the midfield with Kerr at the back and Georgios gets a goal off the bench for Greece in a 2–0 win over the Kazakhs.

Five of the lads inexplicably end up in Slovakia to watch Coniah captain England u21s to victory a few days later, and there are victories too for Armando (including a goal) for Albania who beat Montenegro 3–2, and Greece stunned Spain with a 3–0 trouncing, including another goal for Georgios. I congratulate him on his return and he just shrugs, telling me that Bayern have been in touch with his agent. I nod in understanding before buying an army of Russian Twitter bots to spread rumours about the social life of Uli Hoeness.

Its Rangers visiting Rugby Park next and with Morten still nursing a slight injury we bring Billy back and shift Simone to the side of the engine room. We’re fully fit and ready, knowing that a win will take us within a win of the title. Its fair to say that the Rangers January arrivals so far haven’t worked out, with Cosgrove, Pussetto and Galbraith all underperforming. Indeed, while Galbraith starts, Pussetto only makes the bench for Steven Gerrard’s men.

We get an early chance when a free-kick from Sourlis evades everyone and NippleMan (TM pending) scrabbles it away as it skids off the surface towards the far corner, and he beats out the rebound from Osame. Rangers sit deep and let us have the ball, and Ryan Kent gets a chance to break after a move breaks down. He fires towards the box and Coniah comes out to try and stop him…PENALTY RANGERS! Kent goes down and the referee books Coniah, as Tavernier gets the chance to step up and slot home. 1–0 Rangers.

Guus has an effort saved before Perr has to limp off just after the half hour to be replaced by Justin. He tries to set up Osame a few minutes later but the ball is blocked away, and its Rangers who go closest before halftime — Goldson’s header brilliantly tipped wide by Coniah. 1–0 at half-time.

I move Billy further forward and bring on Paul for the ineffectual Guus at half-time, telling the boys to fucking lift it as for the first time in a long time, our performance has been unacceptable. We zip the ball about and Georgios has a shot blocked. We’re pinging the ball about at the back when a pass from Kik gets intercepted by Roofe, who charges at goal. Coniah comes out and meets him on the edge of the box, booting the ball out into the stands….WHAT?! PENALTY RANGERS?!?!?! WHAT THE FUCKING FUCKING FUCK?! Catts has to restrain me as Tavernier steps up to make it 2–0. SFA Bastards.

Osame has a header wide and we start to build pressure which seems to be abated on several occasions by niggling, unpunished fouls. Armando comes on and him and Georgios have shots fly wide. With time running out, an audacious, outside of the foot effort from Armando is tipped wide and Justin’s header from the corner goes over the bar. Areola takes 14 years over the restart, and hits a strange ball 35 yards which goes straight to Billy. He takes a touch and arcs a ball over Goldson…AND GEORGIOS VOLLEYS HOME! WE’RE STILL IN THIS!!!

Suddenly its all us and Osame crosses for Billy, who shoots straight at Areola and just as Paul looks like he’s going to tuck in the rebound, Ballo-Toure thunders in to clear. Vasilios comes forwards and his deep cross sees Armando brought down in the box…no penalty…of course. but the ball continues out to the left where Osame chases it down and keeps it in. His cross is headed in by Georgios, parried by Areola, and the rebound drops to Paul Nebel with 3 defenders bearing down on him….WHO BACKHEELS IT TO VASILIOS IN FRONT OF AN OPEN GOAL!!! It’s 2–2 and the roof flies off the Moffat stand as fans spill over onto the pitch in celebration!!!

A dramatic way to keep our unbeaten season alive!

We get a clean sweep of awards in the week as I get Manager of the month alongside Simone as Player of the Month and Georgios as Young Player. We do the pleasantries on the Rugby Park turf mid-training session and I don’t hear Billy and Kerr sneaking up behind me with bottles of Irn Bru to spray over me. I’m still furious when a well tailored man wanders through the tunnel, followed by several official looking people. Its Stefano Pioli, which means its AC Milan time.

By the time we get to kick off, the ground is illuminated with enough fireworks and flares to restart a small sun. I’m at full strength, as the injury to Perr in the last game doesn’t affect us due to his ineligibility. Milan’s prize signing Lukaku misses out for the same reason but they have a star studded lineup nonetheless, their midfield of Diaz, Kessie, Tonali and Chiesa in particular having the prospect of causing us nightmares. I shake hands with Stefano Pioli and wander to my dugout, applauding the fans in the stand behind. Let’s make history…

Its a cagey start with Justin and Franck Kessie seemingly in an early competition to see who can force more niggling fouls. We win a couple of corners through pressure, but the first chance falls to Morata, who heads over the bar from a wicked Diaz delivery. Just as the volume begins to dip for the first time, Georgios takes on Kessie and gets to the box, sliding it to his left where Osame hits it….SAVED! Maignan equal to it but the crowd immediately reach deafening again.

Osame is right in the thick of things and has another effort saved a minute later, with the rebound looking destined to fall to him until Tonali gets a boot in. As we cross the half hour mark, it feels like we have had the better of the game — and the remainder of the half is played out in intriguing, if attritional fashion, with the only chance falling to Sanabria for Milan who heads the ball miles over the bar.

I encourage the boys at half-time, and tell them a goal changes everything in this game. It nearly comes straight away for the visitors as a blitz sees Chiesa, Morata and Sanabria all test Coniah, who stands tall to keep us level. It takes us til the hour to create a chance, and it falls to Georgios who heads over the bar from a Vasilios cross. Diaz tests Coniah again and I bring on Guus for Simone with 20 minutes to go.

Milan continue to look more likely with 10 minutes to go, but I push Billy on and gesture to the crowd to lift it for one last push. We win a free-kick 30 yards out when Georgios turns Tomori and is dragged down. Osame steps up and hits a wickedly swerving effort…AND MAIGNAN PARRIES IT STRAIGHT BACK OUT…ITS GUUS TIL!!!! ITS 1–0!!! Guus runs to the corner and is engulfed by the players, most of the subs and at least 3 stewards as the place goes bananas.

Its suddenly us in the ascendancy and Osame has another free-kick saved before with the last move of the match, Morten and Ante link up to release Paul Nebel on the right, and his cross evades everyone as it gets to the back post where Osame is running in…..WIDE!!

How costly could that be?